She was the most beautiful little girl in the world. Fleur, a six week old yellow Labrador puppy entered my life two weeks before Christmas a few years ago.

The story starts long before this. My husband and I both loved dogs and during the course of our thirty one year marriage had had five - three at one time at one stage, each of them no longer required by their original owners. The last dog, Lucy, came with me when I came to my new home four years after being widowed. After she died I decided I couldn't go through the last weeks of a beloved pet's life again, but hated being without a wagging tail to greet me when I came home.

We both had had some experience of people and their guide dogs, so deciding that I could cope with the parting of a healthy young dog to a good cause, I applied to the Guide Dogs for the Blind Association. To my relief they accepted me. However, as the time for Fleur's arrival approached I was very apprehensive.

These are some extracts from the occasional diary that I kept at that time, started well before Fleur arrived.

"The prospect of having a rather special puppy has had its amusing side. For instance, I must assert my authority and show who's boss. My sister says that after five dogs and three children what makes me think I'm going to do any better this time? According to the doggy "Dr Spock" book, this could entail sitting in the dog's bed occasionally! This has caused much amusement for daughters. I'm going to need a baby safety gate for the kitchen as that's where it (gender unknown at that time) will have to sleep as there is no door there, just an arch. Lucy had slept in my bedroom, but this is not allowed - underlings do not sleep near the boss. No human food, no jumping up or on the furniture - all cuddles and games on the floor. At all times I'm the Boss."

A few weeks later:

"Fleur arrives on Friday and I'm seriously scared! Truly, I've been having second (and even third and forth) thoughts about the advisability of this venture. My life is going to be disrupted beyond words - I rather like the comfort of boring."

"The baby gate has been bought and Sarah (number two daughter) has fixed it to the kitchen arch, so that Fleur can be shut in at night or when I need to go out without her. The sitting room has been rearranged to make room for her bed during the day. I'm using the big dog bed with a smaller cardboard box inside for the time being. She'll probably chew her way through several. I've got a few toys for her, but really think we'll need more. I've got a bag of puppy food and a supply of white rice and fish for the first few days. We'll definitely need the Neutradol around the house for a while and there's a good supply of newspaper at the ready - we'll certainly need that. I've moved most of my possessions out of the little dog's reach and my Christmas decorations are of the top-shelf variety. How will we cope over the busy few days with lots of people, excited children and interesting things on the floor?"

I'm definitely scared!

A couple of weeks later:

"I put Fleur to bed. Fleur complained. I went to bed. All quiet for the rest of the night. At 6.30 I crept into the sitting room, looking into the kitchen. She wasn't there! Then she appeared from behind my legs - ever so pleased to see me. I don't know how long she had been in the sitting room - several puddlesworth, I suspect. Her bed didn't look slept in, so I have no idea where she spent most of the night. The baby gate seemed such a good idea to keep her in the kitchen, especially at night. Huh! Why didn't I realise that such a tiny puppy could squeeze through the bars? Must make other arrangements."

"Having a quick shower was hilarious. Fleur didn't like me disappearing behind the shower curtain. When I had finished there was no neatly placed mat - Fleur had removed it to outside the door. It was a trifle difficult getting dried with her hanging on to the bottom of the bath towel. I tried sitting on the loo lid. That was fun - she could reach more of the towel. I gave up - more or less dry would have to do. Back in my bedroom getting dressed took several times longer than usual - little dog decided to help me and thought body lotion on my feet was a great idea - very tasty."

So, Christmas Day arrived and we were spending the day with my elder daughter and her family:

"The children had masses of toys and 'things'. Father Christmas had been very good indeed. But Fleur was totally confused with piles of goodies on the floor and two excited children. Excited children meant tired, tetchy children. Fleur was at her worst. Over-excited like the children, she was running wild - with teeth into everything and everybody. Several puddles, too. I couldn't wait to get home."

"Boxing Day was better. Lots of nice people to bite and lots of fussing. Right up her street."

This little lady was like the little girl with the curl "when she was good she was very, very good, but when she was bad she was horrid!"

So life went on. House training was fairly straightforward and she soon learned to be 2busy2 in the garden. Standing in the bitter cold of January began to pay off. Until she had her injections I had to carry her round to the paper shop in the morning but she was becoming very heavy. It was obvious that she was going to be a very large dog, much larger than our own Labrador had been.

Her "tantrums" were a major problem. Bored with just walking along the road Fleur would suddenly turn, jump up and start biting and pulling on my sleeve. Nothing would stop her. I could only stand still until even that activity bored her.

Some other local puppy walkers were arranging to meet one morning a week in a local coffee shop. Now that was an interesting experience. On our first visit I arrived very bloodied as the result of one of her tantrums. Passing the other tables to reach our allotted corner, Fleur thought it was all for her entertainment. She was up to investigate every table, clearing a few on the way. The other puppies, rather older than Fleur, lay as good as gold under the table. Not Fleur. That was just boring. She had much better ideas. Her idea of a good outing was to cause as much mayhem as possible.

Still, she was getting better. Still absolutely gorgeous much of the time and great fun, especially when we met up with other puppy walkers and their charges. It was lovely to see all these not so little ones playing.

She was so good about waiting for her food. Right from the start she would sit and wait till I had blown my whistle and told her to "eat up". (This is the method used to link whistle to food so that the blind owner can get a free running dog back again). She was certainly an easy dog to feed and never bothered people for human food - even biscuits were safe on the coffee table.

Our first bus ride was a hoot! By now quite a big dog, she refused to get on the bus. It's not easy to life a reluctant Labrador on to a bus (or a train, as I later discovered). She didn't like the movement of the bus one bit. She much preferred my car. Then as we attempted to get off, she decided not to and came back up the "in" side. By which time I seriously wondered if I was cut out for this.

As summer approached:

"My garden resembles a flowerpot graveyard. Now more inclined to play out of doors on her own, Fleur has located every plastic pot that I possess and has been having a great time chasing them around the garden before "killing" them and chewing them up. My dustbin is getting full of some very strange "domestic waste". Garden plants seemed to be an enjoyable way of supplementing her diet. Why was "no" my most-used word? At lease she has been getting quite a bit of exercise with all this gardening activity. What a good thing I've decided that I don't really need a garden."

"I don't think there is a single plastic pot left. There are some lovely holes in the garden and the lawn. Plants have been dug up and chewed. If any poor flower dares to show its head, it's immediately snapped off. I've also been presented with pieces of broken fencing (which I suspect belongs to next door). Can't think what to do if she starts breaking down the already dilapidated fencing."

She was so clever. By now she was sleeping in the bathroom - the only room I could shut her in. At night as I picked up her bed to take it into the bathroom, Fleur would look around for her teddy bear and take and put it into her bed! On one occasion she brought me her empty water bowl - obviously reminding me of my negligence.

Our free runs in the woods or park were much more successful than I could have anticipated, given her general pranks. She would almost always come when called. Admittedly, the whistle and the association with the food in my pocket helped.

Living in a bungalow meant that she didn't get a lot of practice at coping with stairs. So visits to my daughters involved stair-management lessons. She wasn't at all impressed.

When your child starts school, you always hope that he or she won't be the naughtiest in the class, or at least I did. As the weather warmed up our local supervisor organised training sessions in a field not too far away. And yes, Fleur was the naughtiest. Everything was a huge game. All those other dogs to play with. It was playtime all the time so far as she was concerned.

Sarah came with me for our first visit, bringing my camera. Oh dear! Each picture tells a rather sad story of me not being able to control anything Fleur had in mind - which was definitely not what our supervisor had in mind. Thank goodness my coat was easily washable - it was covered in mud when Fleur have one of her tantrums when she wasn't allowed to do as she wanted.

As Fleur grew larger and stronger, it became apparent that I wasn't coping too well with her outdoor training. It was at our last training session in the field that the end came. An accident to my hand made us all realise that Fleur was just too much for me. I really felt that a younger person, preferably with a family would have been better.

In retrospect I'm glad I had the opportunity to know Fleur. I loved her dearly, but was not the best foster-mother for her. She finished her puppy days with a more experienced (and younger) "mum" who also had a husband and two strapping sons. She completed her training and is now working with her blind owner. I have a nice photograph of them both and have spoken with him on the phone. Although a good working dog, she can also be quite naughty when it suits her.

There is a great need for more puppy-walkers, otherwise there won't be any guide dogs. One of our local walkers is now on her twelfth puppy, so not everyone finds it as difficult as I did. It really is a great way to "borrow" a puppy and do something worthwhile at the same time.